first, let me start this off by saying that i dont work nearly as many hours as most salarymen in japan. furthermore, im healthy, content, and actually like the job im doing. this post is not about me, but rather the hardcore salarymen out there and the japanese social structure that forces them into working more and more hours until their bodies just cant take it anymore.

dying from working too much is a real problem here in japan. seriously. its a common enough occurrence to have a word created just for it: karoshi (過労死), or "death from overwork." the first reported case happened in 1969 when a salaryman in his 20's with no major health problems suddenly died after working more than 40 days in a row. the number of reported karoshi victims per year has generally increased since then to almost two hundred confirmed deaths every year (the most recent official stats i could find: 189 deaths and 208 severely ill in 2007 wikipedia). the most common medical reasons for these deaths are heart attacks and strokes due to stress and fatigue. salarymen are literally working themselves to death.

im not trying to say this is the biggest problem in the world right now, cause in the whole scope of things, its really not. but it is still a tragedy nonetheless.

why are so many japanese people working themselves to death? i think the answer is much more complicated than what i, as a short-term foreigner, can determine. but im pretty sure it has something to do with the incredible number of hours they work. japanese people, on average, work more hours per year than any other industrialized country (international journal of health services). the companies and corporations that make their employees work these hours are only half of the problem though. the other half comes from the values found in japanese society that make salarymen think they should dedicate themselves completely to their job. i see it everyday from my coworkers. many of them work 12-14 hour days, 6 or sometimes even 7 days a week. they have been trained to put health, family, and leisure time second to their job. though most salarymen get away with this unhealthy lifestyle, every year a couple hundred of them are not so fortunate.

as an outsider to the system, i dont have any power to fix this problem. sadly, all i can do is write about it and hope that things eventually get better. ive got my fingers crossed for you, japan.

like pulling on a rubber band, i too have been trying my damnedest to expand my mind. this rubber band has been stretching itself thin by trying new things, living in different countries, meeting interesting people, and learning about the world around it.

like stretching the rubber band out further and further, i feel like ive been continually pulling myself into newer and stranger situations where im forced to expand and adjust. learn and adjust. grow. and you know what? its been fantastic.

but if you stretch a rubber band out too far, you run the risk of snapping it. and i feel like theres a real danger of stretching myself out too far as well. thus begins my journey backwards.

i reached the breaking point almost two months ago, during my first week in tokyo. my head had already made up its mind without telling me. its time i leave and pull back before im stretched too far away from who, where, and what i want to be.

since that moment, ive been saving money and biding time. making plans and looking forward (or is it backwards?). waiting. japan, youve been great to me, but i feel like its time we start seeing other people. its not you its me. its been quite a wild ride, but its just time that this rubber band starts retracting. returning back to its original shape. back to where it belongs.

and pretty soon ill have the means to do it.

i live directly above a bar which is directly above a drug store
my apartment is a mere 159 square feet (14.8 m^2)
change trains twice a day at shinjuku station, the busiest train station in the world
on clear days (rare in tokyo) i can see mt fuji from the office windows
miss being around people i can understand in a city i enjoy
i hear every train that passes through the station outside my apartment window
not going home before 8pm is rewarded by free (sometimes sushi) dinner in the office
getting to write code and playing with bank-related gadgets all day is a pleasure
home is where the heart is; mine seems to have never left boston
on the first floor of my office building is a tasty little coffee shop
my business card is in japanese on one side and english on the other
employed by a company employed by a bank
started wearing a jacket to work just last week
old drunk people on the street can be funny no matter what language they slur their words in
on my first week my manager called a meeting to tell us that no one can work only 8 hour days
nearing the end of my journey and excited about the next one

a typical weekday for me (and some weekends as well) goes something like this.

__before work__
i wake up around 6:45-ish, usually after my third alarm goes off. i shower, maybe eat some boring yogurt, do a couple of sit-ups, and then commute to work. it takes about an hour from my door to the office due to 15 mins of walking, 10 mins of waiting for trains, and the rest of the time riding said trains. i usually review japanese flash cards on my way to and from work.

__at work__
when i finally make it through the (multiple) security guards and security card scanners, i get to sit down at my desk around 8:30am - and thats when the real fun starts! gadgets that are currently chilling on my desk right now just waiting to be played with include:

• * an atm card reader
• * a couple of fake atm cards
• * a laptop
• * a high-end tablet
• * a thin client computer

each of these have different security settings and most are even on separate networks. it is my job to play with these devices and to write the code so that they all communicate to each other securely and correctly. most of the code im writing these days is actionscript for front end adobe air applications and java for back end jboss services. personally, the work im doing is really interesting, and professionally, i think the experience here will greatly help me grow as a software developer.

__after work__
despite the fun projects i get to do on the job, the hours are pretty atrocious and make it difficult to have a life outside of work. on an average day, i might leave work around 8:30pm or so. its hard to complain about the 10-12 hour days to any of my coworkers though, because most of them arrive before me and leave after me. after the commute back to my apartment, im usually pretty drained. ill have just enough energy to talk to some friends online, eat something japanese and tasty, and chill a bit before i fall asleep.

this is my version of what its like to be a foreigner (外人) working for a japanese software company. please note that everyone's experience may be different, and ive only just begun working here, so mileage may vary.

i work for a software consulting company in tokyo. all of the developers on my project speak english fluently, but almost everyone else in the office, including the project managers, clients, and staff, do not. though my company appreciates developers who can speak japanese, it is not a requirement to work here.

as expected, the language barrier makes normal software tasks much more interesting. for example, every day we have a daily stand-up meeting where we all pile into one room and discuss the tasks we are working on and identify any problems we have. it usually starts with the project manager talking in japanese about high priority issues. he occasionally gets interjected by bi-lingual interpreters who try their best to translate the important parts of his speech into english for the half of the room who dont understand. this is usually followed by developers asking questions and discussing certain problems theyre working on, which then have to get translated for the japanese speakers to understand. its good practice for my japanese skills, but honestly, technical japanese is way, way over my head. i spend my time during these meetings trying to decipher an unintelligible language and hope that the crucial parts will eventually get translated later for me.

because we're working for a japanese client, all of our requirements documents are written in japanese. most of the older documents have already been translated into english for the developers, but unfortunately, there are always new requirements coming in which have not been translated yet. ive spent countless hours dealing with screenshots, flow diagrams, and spreadsheets that are still written in technical japanese. when google translate doesnt suffice, we have to track down a bi-lingual coworker or schedule time with an interpreter for help.

obviously, since i work in japan, i am expected to use a japanese computer. the operating system and my development tools all are all in japanese, but thats not too big of an issue. most of the time, i can either slowly read the japanese menus or just set the language to english when im in a hurry. but the one problem i didnt expect was using a japanese keyboard. this is kind of what mine looks like:


it looks basically the same from far away, but on closer inspection you can see that (a) there are a couple new keys (check out the ones near the space bar), (b) many of the keys have been changed to do various new things (hitting caps lock turns the keyboard into some kind of possessed japanese demon), and (c) some of the keys have been moved to new locations completely. go ahead and try to find the single or even the double quotes. now how about the caret (this thing ^). where the f did that key go?

of course, there are some frustrations to be dealt with working as a foreigner in most other countries - but working in japan offers some unique benefits too. for example, ive never experienced more respect towards others in the office and downright dedication to the job than i have here in japan. sure, i cant have real conversations with most of my coworkers, but i can still use my time here to learn something from all of them. ill be leaving here soon, but i hope to take with me the memories - both the good and the bad - of my brief professional experience as a software developer in japan.

another birthday has come and went (give or take 42 minutes or so). after reading some really nice things that friends have been posting on my wall all day, it really hit me hard how much i take my friendships for granted. even though i am severely independent and hard-headed, i wouldnt have made it half as far or become half the person ive become if it wasnt for the people who have supported me through these years. i am truly grateful for everything my friends have ever done for me. for all the times i left them hanging, spelled their names wrong, confused them, moved further away from them, or made bad jokes at their expense, i am genuinely sorry.

instead of partying all night and drinking so much i cant even tell which language im speaking anymore, i decided it was a better use of my time tonight to sit down and write out this quick post. even though i do a terrible job of showing it sometimes, i really appreciate the friends ive got. and i miss all of you. now, cue the emo music.

ive recently fallen into a great opportunity to witness the legendary japanese salaryman (サラリーマン) in person. before this week, ive only caught fleeting glimpses and heard rumors of how they spend more time in the office than out of it, how the only clothes they own are suits and neckties, and how they drink themselves stupid multiple nights a week. but now that ive moved to tokyo (東京), the breeding ground of said legends, i am surrounded by them all day everyday. and it seems that almost everything i heard is true and then some. i bet i could write books on all the peculiarities of salarymen, but ill try to keep it to just a couple of blog posts.

__japanese salarymen and comical sleep deprivation__
the salarymen that ive been meeting lately typically work about 12 hours day. one diligent person i work with didnt even go home one of the nights this week; he worked the entire night through, working more than 24 hours straight. on top of the long weekdays, salarymen often work at least one day of the weekend too. its easy to see how all those hours could make someone exhausted pretty quickly. but what makes it worse - at least in tokyo - is that many salarymen have incredibly long commutes as well. another person i work with commutes close to 2 hours a day.. EACH WAY!! so, if you add almost 4 hours of commuting to a 12 hour work day, these people are left with about 8 hours of free time. after factoring in the time spent eating meals, binge drinking because of the crazy amounts of stress, and raising a family, theres literally not enough time in the day for salarymen to get a decent amount of sleep.

and it shows!! not only do many salarymen pass out on the trains (sometimes even while standing) during their commutes to and from work, they also fall asleep at work. and because everyone is so sleep deprived, its become socially acceptable to sometimes take quick naps at their desk during lunch. just within my first 3 days at my new job, ive already heard 2 salarymen snoring at work.. IN THE BATHROOM!! thats right, some people were so tired they either purposefully or accidentally (im not sure which is worse) fell asleep while sitting on the john. one thing to note is that they werent silently nodding off either; these salarymen were so tired they fell into deep snore-tastic sleep. on the toilet. in a public restroom. at work. incredible.

i am here because i can be. but im also here because i dont know where else to go. i am young and anchorless. but i am also naive and careless. im seeking adventures and taking risks while i still can. but i am also saying more byes than hellos lately. im doing great things and making good choices, while constantly doing terrible things and making stupid choices. im hungry for new things, and im selfishly eating all i can.

im not looking down at anyones life plan nor am i trying to prop up mine. i have a friend whose full time job is a mom, and shes happy as a clam raising her family of cute kids. i admire the fact that she found what she wanted in life and i support her choices (even though she probably could have picked a much much better city to live in). i, on the other hand, have not yet found what it is im looking for. there will come a day when my responsibilities become too great that i wont be able to maintain this life of thrills and new experiences. but until that day comes, i intend on making as many blind, adventurous, pointless, and interesting decisions as possible.

im trying my best to learn, experience, and grow as much as i can before i grow up, grow old, or end up growing out of this phase.

ive been traveling to tokyo (東京) a lot lately.

last week it was for the job interviews. exactly one week ago, i put on the only suit ive ever owned, boarded a shinkansen (新幹線), and interviewed with some tech companies in tokyo. one of them was crazy enough to want to hire me. and so after a bit of negotiation, i had a beautiful job lined up. i start next week!!


this week im going to tokyo to look for apartments. i think i found a pretty sweet one in shinjuku (新宿), but the application process is crazy intense and can take weeks for some foreigners. the building owner is even going to research my new employer to make sure they are a solid enough company to employ one of their tenants (me). if i fill out the application correctly and there arent any problems holding up the process, i should know whether theyll let me rent their apartment within two weeks from today.

this weekend i plan on moving to tokyo permanently. since i wont have an apartment just yet, i reserved a hotel room for a week to give me some sort of stable roof over my head. hopefully i wont have to stay there too long. living out of suitcases is exciting and all, but im looking forward to getting back to a sort of normal life. emphasis on the "sort of."

warning: this post is probably one of my more rambling and boring posts. things have been getting crazier within the last few days. this post is more for me to get my thoughts out of my head than for people to read and be entertained.

so like i said, things have been getting crazier still. at long last, the interviews have started coming in. i had two interviews so far this week: one was a non-technical interview over the phone with a small exciting company based in tokyo, and the other was a video/screen-sharing technical code writing interview with a big consulting firm just outside of tokyo. one interesting side note was that i was asked to show off my japanese skills during one of the interviews, which marks the first time ive ever spoken more than one (non-programming) language during an interview. terrifying to think about, yet satisfying to accomplish.

anyway, to my surprise, one of the companies asked me the very next day to do a second interview with their software engineers in person next week. which is great news for the part of me that really wants to find a job as quickly as possible, but bad news for my japanese studies because it means ill have to miss a day of class during my last week of school.

oh, and thats another thing; ive got 7 days to decide if i can/want to stay longer at yamasa. there are two reasons why i would like to extend my stay here for two more weeks, one is that i dont want to give up on my japanese studies yet, and the other is that i want to have a roof over my head. i would love to stay longer, but i dont know if i have that option because of interviews and/or starting a new job. but if i dont decide soon to continue studying japanese at yamasa, ill be forced to move into a hostel/hotel until i can either find a job or run out of money and leave the country.

things to do next week:

• 1. study japanese
• 2. tell my friends and family i miss them
• 3. prepare for two more phone interviews
• 4. go to tokyo (all day) for a second interview
• 5. decide if i can stay at yamasa and study japanese for a couple more weeks
• 6. if i have to leave school, then i need to pack and find a cheap hostel/hotel to live for a while (starting friday the 30th)
• 7. try not to lose my mind
• 8. shave

with less than two weeks left until i go homeless again, things are starting to get a little more tense. im paid up on tuition and housing until the 30th of september, but after that im not sure what will happen next. the money i saved while teaching kids english in the JET program has been evaporating at a blinding speed lately, leaving me with only a couple options until i have to return to the states. im not complaining about the situation, because i knew it would eventually come to this. i guess im just a little surprised by how fast it all happened.

my immediate goal is to find a software job, and soon! when im not busy doing school stuff, im writing a lot of code, playing around with new languages and frameworks, and sending my resume out to recruiters and foreign companies in tokyo (and occasionally writing stupid blog posts).

basically, my options are: (a) enroll in more japanese classes at yamasa until i run out of money and have to leave japan, (b) move to tokyo and keep trying to find a job until i run out of money and have to leave japan, (c) move back to the states while continuing to look for a job in tokyo, or (d) completely give up on japan and move back to the east coast where im pretty sure i can find an awesome job pretty quickly.

ive got 12 days to figure things out and make a decision. hopefully at least one of the two interviews i have this week will blossom into something great, but i wont hold my breath. if nothing happens soon, ill be saying hello to my old friend homelessness again. hey mr homelessness, did you miss me?

hitchhiking fail (june, 2010)

a couple of weeks ago i got to hang out with a good friend from vegas who now lives in japan with his awesome wife and kid. not only did they let me crash at their place for a couple days while i was temporarily homeless, but they also took me around and showed me some of the neat places okayama (岡山) had to offer.

kourakuen park, okayama (岡山の後楽園)

we first went to a famous park/garden called kourakuen (後楽園) where my friends, incidentally, got their wedding pictures taken years before. kourakuen is one of the Three Great Gardens in japan (日本三名園), and it was easily apparent why it was so highly thought of; it was definitely one of the most beautiful parks ive seen in japan.

vegas friends in japan!!

though the park was absolutely beautiful, the incredibly hot and humid weather made it quite unbearable to walk around it for very long. luckily for us, the comfortably air-conditioned okayama castle (岡山城) was just on the other side of the park. it was neat to look at from the outside, but all of the modern conveniences like elevators and AC were constant reminders that the original had unfortunately been destroyed in world war 2, and that we were only experiencing a reconstruction. that being said, it was still fun to walk around and explore it with good friends.

okayama castle (岡山城)

last weekend was the first time i had the opportunity to witness what the cosplay scene in japan is all about. "cosplay," for people out there that dont know, is short for "costume play." it usually entails people dressing up like their favorite video game and/or anime characters and sometimes even acting the parts. on saturday, some friends and i heard about a world cosplay parade in nagoya and we were curious enough to go check it out.

since my friends had press badges, we mainly hung out near the press boxes which were great places for people watching. i saw hundreds of anime and video game fans from around the world wear interesting makeup and sport awesome handmade costumes and props. aside from a few uncomfortable moments dealing with the occasional weirdos, as cosplay events have a way of attracting, the parade was pretty fun. and even with my very limited knowledge of japanese anime and video games, i was able to recognize a couple of characters myself.

a character from "one piece" named sengoku, at the nagoya cosplay parade

after the cosplay parade, we came back to okazaki to check out a 2 hour fireworks festival at okazaki castle. ill say it now: no one does fireworks quite like japan can. since more than 70% of japans fireworks are designed and manufactured here in okazaki, the annual fireworks festival here is used as a showcase of the latest models and arrangements. it was pretty awesome to sit next to hundreds of people on grassy castle grounds and enjoy our picnics, drinks, friends, and the explosions in the sky together.

my first weekend living in a modern city in japan has opened my eyes wider than i could have imagined. it was more than just the physical aspects, like the social options and conveniences of living in a big city, that affected me. and it had more to do than changing jobs from a teacher to student. the move to okazaki was merely a catalyst to an overdue self reflection, and helped bring about a readjustment of perspective on who i want to be and what i want to do with my life.

i feel like an entire layer of confusion has been peeled back to reveal the person i used to be. i lived an entire year caught up in self-inflicted hardships while complaining about it the whole time. i went one year staying clear of technology and the software industry only to realize how much i miss it. and i spent an entire year pushing myself further down the rabbit hole of adventure, all the while not noticing how far ive pushed myself away from my friends back in the states.

JET was supposed to be my sabbatical; i was burnt out from two crazy years of full-time grad school and full-time work and needed a break to sit back and relax my brain. but somewhere along the line i got caught up in the web of my own adventures and lost sight of the things i really love most.

to the friends out there who have almost given up on me for being a selfish masochist who pointlessly seeks out new adventures just to complain about them to the world: i hope you can understand that i needed to come here and do what i did, but that i realize now what it cost me. i plan on finishing up these two months of study and then getting back to the things i love.

tomorrow marks the end of a chapter. its been a wild ride as a pseudo english teacher, but come tomorrow im getting off this roller coaster for good. this past year has been eye opening to say the least. i discovered many things about myself i never knew before, like how i dont like teaching english, living in a small remote town, or living in a house without a flush toilet and with an outdoor shower. but i want to stress that not all of it was negative. in fact, i feel that i accomplished everything i came here to do.

__three goals__
one year ago i arrived in kihoku with three specific goals in mind:

• 1. learn how to not hate kids,
• 2. learn some japanese, and
• 3. explore the hell out of japan.

im happy to admit that i feel good about my progress so far.

as for the not hating kids thing, i mainly wanted to learn how to deal with them; i wanted to learn how to interact with them and see things from their perspective. and though i still dont like some of the kids ive spent the last year or so teaching, at least ive learned how to not automatically hate all of them.

ive been told that im progressing quite well with my japanese ability, but i personally feel that theres still a lot of room for improvement. A LOT. out off my three goals, i feel like this was my weakest accomplishment.

and as for the traveling and exploring goal, i thing i pretty much nailed it. ive amazed all of the teachers i worked with everyday with stories of seeing temples, castles, and beaches near and far. i feel very lucky to have had the opportunities to travel so much. exploring japan was a blast! some of the teachers have even told me that they think i saw more in the year i lived here than they saw their entire lives; i didnt disagree with them.

__the next chapter__
so now that this adventure is over, what comes next? i miss my friends back in america and i feel that this distance is definitely straining things, but i just cant quite come back yet. i feel that there are still a couple more adventures to have in japan before i can return without regrets.

tomorrow ill leave this small town filled with old people and spiders and head for my next adventure. after a couple of quick visits with some boston and vegas friends who now live in japan, ill head north to okazaki city (岡崎市) where i plan to study japanese for a couple months. theres a non-profit japanese language school there called yamasa that offers short but intense language programs, and i look forward to learning japanese in a more formal setting.

after studying japanese for 2 or 3 months i plan to move to tokyo (東京) where one of three things will happen:

• a. i get deported because of work visa issues,
• b. i run out of money and have to leave, or
• c. i find a software developer job and happily work there for about a year before leaving japan.

this means that no matter which option actually pans out, i only intend on living in japan for at most one more year before moving on and trying something new.

as i close this first section of my third life, i look forward to the upcoming challenges and self exploration. tonight ill fall asleep one last time in my old centipede-infested house. come tomorrow, may the next adventure begin.

the beaches in okinawa (沖縄) were some of the prettiest things ive ever seen. the water was clear and warm. the sand was soft and white. the coral was colorful, the weather was sunny, the girls were beautiful. ah, 'twas truly an awesome trip.

aragusuku beach, miyakojima (宮古島の新城ビーチ)

snorkeling at aragusuku beach, miyakojima (宮古島の新城ビーチ)

i stayed on a small southern island called miyakojima (宮古島) for three days. even though there was a typhoon fast approaching japan, i braved the strong waves and snorkeled in the crystal-clear waters at aragusuku beach (新城ビーチ). the next day i went to maehama beach (前浜ビーチ), which could very well be the nicest beach ive ever seen. its pristine white sand stretched out for what seemed like miles into the horizon. after swimming and tanning (tanning? pssh, more like burning) for a bit, i went to a small nearby island called kurima (来間島) where i climbed the stairs to the top of a watch tower and gazed at the beautiful shoreline below.

underwater pic of the coral reef at aragusuku (新城ビーチ)

maehama beach, okinawa (沖縄の前浜ビーチ)

next, i spent a day and a half on the main island, okinawa hontou (沖縄本島). i spent my time there checking out an average japanese castle and a sweet aquarium with whale sharks and manta rays.

a whale shark and his friends at an aquarium in okinawa

an okinawan sunset from the shores of miyakojima (宮古島)

for all of the beauty that okinawa had to offer, it also had a really crappy side to it. because of the heavy american military presence that still exists there, it has quite a different feel from mainland japan. the people in okinawa were much less friendly than im used to, either because our rude american customs have rubbed off on them or because there are more anti-westerners due to the many US bases. though the people in miyakojima were nicer, they were upsettingly open about selling sex to tourists (almost as much as amsterdams red light district). when the sun went down it seemed like every block had girls standing outside wearing too much makeup and fake smiles, eager to hike up their skirts whenever i walked by.

kurima island, okinawa (沖縄の来間島)

outside of the rudeness and sex-peddling, okinawa was an awesome place to spend a week in the sun. im glad i went, and i hope i can visit it again someday.

without a doubt, my favorite part about living in an old house in a small remote japanese town is the number of things that crawl around on my floors, walls, ceilings, and face. how could i possibly feel lonely when ive got what seems like hundreds of roommates always begging for a chance to hang out with me?

__friends with 8 legs__
first, i want to give a shout out to my old friends from last year, the gigantic huntsman spiders. i havent seen your hand-sized bodies perch on my walls all winter. and frankly, i was getting a bit worried that you may never come back to visit. sometimes i swear i can still hear the echos of your heavy footsteps - not unlike the sound of a typewriter - click-clacking on my floor as i chase you around my house with a shoe, playing a friendly game i like to call "get the fuck out of my house right now or die." fortunately, the fast-approaching summer has put my mind at ease because i get to watch all of your lovely offspring grow up right before my very eyes (dont think i didnt see them hiding in the folds of my curtains the other night, cause i totally did).

just hanging out in my tatami room

__friends with no legs__
to some of my newer guests: i appreciate the company, but can you please try to pick up after yourselves more often? though i thoroughly enjoy the fact that you invite all of your lovely slug friends to party in my house on a nightly basis, seeing your trails of slime across my floors every morning kind of bums me out. no one likes messy roommates. i hope theres no hard feelings from all the salt i sprinkle around the cracks in my walls, around my doors and windows, and sometimes on your gooey bodies. its not that i enjoy watching the salt shrivel you up like a testicle in a cold breeze, its just that i really despise having to wash my floors every fucking morning because of your mess.

__friends with 100 legs__
and lastly, i want to thank all of the ムカデ ("mukade"; poisonous centipedes) for all the attention youve been giving me lately. i can tell that you are quite infatuated with me because of all the times you try to snuggle with me at night. to be honest, im quite flattered. remember the time i was about to fall asleep but suddenly noticed you were crawling around inside my pillowcase exactly where my head was supposed to go? that was cute. so cute, in fact, that i had trouble falling asleep the rest of the night because i couldnt stop thinking about it.

this is what my friend looked like dead

i think i should draw the line after last night though. to be clear, im not looking for a relationship right now and id rather us just be friends. i dont know why you thought itd be ok, but crawling into my futon while i was sleeping and gently yet poisonously nibbling on my fingers was not cool. i like you and all, but i did not appreciate waking up to you trying to climb onto my face. because i fell asleep alone that night, i was so startled to wake up with you in my futon that i may have accidentally sprayed too much bug spray on you while you tried to run away from me. maybe now youll get the hint that im just not that into you.

look, i hate kids just as much as the next guy. but since i started teaching english to little japanese children, ive actually had a slight change of heart. and though it pains me to admit it, ill man up and say it here: sometimes kids can be cute.

every week, when i show up to one of my elementary schools, a bunch of tiny kids who arent yet to-cool-for-school stop what theyre doing and run right up to me. "ku-ji-ra sen-sei!" theyll yell through gigantic smiles as they try to give me huge hugs and hold my hands. as we all keep walking closer to the entrance, some of them break away to show off how good they are at unicycling, jumping rope, or hula hooping. their faces light up when i say "上手ね" ("jouzu ne"; youre skillful) or "すごい" ("sugoi"; thats great). its pretty awesome to see kids get so happy to see me. heck, ive been in relationships before where the girls werent even half as excited to see me as some of these kids are every single day.

there have been several times now where ill be sitting in the teachers office planning future lessons when ill hear a couple of small voices call my name. first theyll say the required "しつれいします" ("shitsureishimasu"; im being rude. all students must say this before they enter the teachers office. upon leaving, they say "shitsureishimashita"; i was rude), come over to my desk, and shyly hand me something. ive received some beautiful cards and letters - usually written in japanese or the occasionally admirable but terrible attempt at english - thanking me for teaching them english, asking me to teach them more, or telling me how fun my classes are. now dont get me wrong - i, like you, think children are terrible creatures from the depths of hades - but innocent thoughtful gestures like this prove that some kids can actually be pretty freaking rad.

i like to jog around my neighborhood (read: around most of the town) a lot. more than just fun exercise, its also been a great way to interact with some of my kids outside of school. some of my younger students get so excited to see me jogging down their street that theyll stop playing catch or whatever they were doing and chase after me. "鯨先生、待っていい！" ("kujira sensei, matte ii!"; wait up, whale teacher!). some kids even jog along side me for a block or two after i ask them if theyd like to join me. my favorite time though, was when these two cute 3rd grade girls followed me on their bikes for over 3 miles, laughing and smiling the whole way. they tried talking to me while we jogged and biked, saying things like "speed up" when we were going downhill (cause bikes can coast faster than legs can jog) and "speed down" when going uphill (cause little girls are apparently wimps at biking up hills). to me, language practice, exercising, and having fun with kids that dont suck, made the time fly by so quick i barely even noticed how tired i was after the 5th mile.

ah, good times.

this is one of many posts about my awesome trip to china. while earlier posts are about sights like tiananmen square, the forbidden city, and the great wall, this one is about the actual cities themselves.

i only visited two cities during my trip to china: beijing and xi'an. the two couldnt be more different from each other if they tried. one was quite terrible while the other was incredibly awesome. in this post i hope to explain why ill never return to beijing but why i cant wait to go back to xi'an again.

__the difference in attitude__
lets start with the people. beijing people suck. now, to be clear, im not saying that all the people in beijing suck - im just stating that all the people I MET in beijing suck (for all i know, the other 19.5 million might be the raddest people in the world). many beijingers chased after me annoyingly trying to sell me something i didnt want. and when i did actually want to buy something, like at a ticket counter or restaurant, they were loud and rude. people treated me like i was nothing but a dumb american tourist with too much money to spend. and maybe i was. but in sharp contrast, the people in xi'an seemed to treat me and each other with respect. they wore more smiles, were less pushy, and were almost always helpful and patient with me. everyone in xi'an seemed generally less shady and more eager to treat me like a human being rather than an object like in beijing.

__the difference in appearance__
aside from the peoples attitudes, the feel of the cities was also very different. beijing was dirty. i watched countless beijingers - both young and old - throw their trash to the ground without a care in the world. and boy, the city sure smelled like it too. xi'an had its share of awful smells too, but at least it was a lot easier on the eyes. in contrast to beijings dull, dirty, and drab style, xi'an was a beautiful city with bright colors and pleasant architecture.

__third world capitals suck__
after traveling to india and absolutely hating delhi (while loving the other cities), i had mistakenly thought that visiting big cities in third world-ish countries was a bad idea. but china changed my mind. its not big cities that suck - its capitals. xi'an is a big city with more than 8 million people, but it was absolutely awesome. now ive learned my lesson. even with having only two samples, and even though ill probably eat my own narrow-minded words later on, ill conclude right now that capitals of third world-ish countries are terrible, terrible places that should be avoided at all costs.

i took a trip to china during golden week and now im writing about the adventures i had. if youre interested in previous posts, check out part one to read about my tiananmen square experiences and part two about the forbidden city.

__taking the bait__
it was a good thing we set aside an entire day to see the great wall - not because seeing it took the whole day - but because we stupidly fell for a scam that lasted the whole stupid day. being an american tourist who doesnt speak chinese in beijing has its disadvantages; one of them is being a constant target for scammers.

we left our hotel in the morning with full intentions of DIY traveling and taking public transportation to get to the wall all by ourselves. we planned to walk to a subway station, take a train to a bus station, and then find a bus to take us to the great wall. but as our luck would have it, that was the same morning beijing decided to close down some of its subway stations. with the sudden change of plans we decided to take the advice of our travel books and use a recommended tour group company for transportation. an hour later we arrived at the wall. so far so good. but we didnt know what we had signed up for until much later.

the first set of steep stairs

__the great wall__
the great wall of china was truly amazing to see up close. but it was even cooler to be able to climb up it and stand at the top. before visiting the great wall, i had been confused to hear about people climbing the wall. arent walls made to be unclimbable? growing up in vegas, where every house is surrounded by perfectly straight walls built on top of flat land, i imagined the great wall to be more or less the same thing - just bigger. in reality, however, the great wall spans five thousand miles up and down mountains and across rivers, deserts, and grasslands. there are many steep sections of the wall where "walking along the top of it" actually means "climbing up a mountain."
i must admit that out of all the places ive been so far, the great wall was the best combination of history, exercise, and beauty that ive been lucky enough to experience.
__the great scam__
it was a fun hike. the scenery was more than beautiful. the day had all the tell-tale signs of going down in history as a great fucking day. but that all changed when we left the wall to get back on the tour bus. it turned out that the trip was far from over. after the wall they took us to some lame tourist attraction. we found out later it had been a movie set to some old chinese movies we had never heard of. once we were thoroughly bored, they took us to the next stop on the tour. it was a building that tried really hard to appear like a jade museum. but after showing us a couple of impressively large jade stones, they ushered us into another room where they tried like hell to sell tons of jade crap to us. the next couple of stops were cosco-sized stores full of trinkets and souvenirs. my travel buddy and i didnt even get out of the bus for the last stop because we were so fed up with the whole thing.

when we finally made it back to beijing, the tour screwed us over one last time by dropping us off in an unfamiliar location with no actual bus stop in sight. after walking around aimlessly for a while, we eventually realized we were completely lost, gave up, and hailed a cab to take us back to tiananmen. all in all, the scammers didnt swindle any extra money out of us; but they did successfully steal quite a bit of our precious time and sanity instead.

this is the second post about an epic trip to china i took earlier this month. im writing this mainly to supplement my failing memory - but bored readers are welcome to enjoy it as well. check out part one to read about my tiananmen square experiences.

__forbidden city__
six hundred years old and full of history, beijing's forbidden city was fun to walk around for a little while. but eventually, the immense size, beautiful but repetitive architecture, and my short attention span caused me to lose interest after about an hour of walking through the maze-like ancient city. im glad i went. it was cool and all. but meh.

__a food market__
we decided to stroll down some random streets on our journey from the center of town back to our hostel. soon enough we found ourselves smack dab in the middle of a crowded food market. the sights were novel to say the least - and ill get to them next - but first i must describe the vivid smells that hit my nostrils with every step down these streets.
one step forward, and the most terribly pungent smell of atrocious diarrhea-ish scents smacks you hard in the face. china is not the most clean of countries; billions of people throwing their trash on the ground has its consequences. after proper cringing, the next step down the street luckily changes aromas dramatically. that second step brings your nose in contact with the aroma of various meats on sticks grilling just a couple of feet away from your face. i havent eaten meat just shy of four years now - and good riddance to it - but i can still appreciate the tantalizing smell of grilled meat sometimes. unfortunately, the third step into the food market changes up the smells again. its back to diarrhea. and the next step its grilled meats. the entire street went on like this, changing frequently from terrible to tasty. it was a roller-coaster for the nostrils.
with the smells aside, the things i saw as i walked through the food market blew my mind. vendors were selling sea horses, starfish, scorpions, spiders, centipedes, and many other strange unnameable critters. i cant speak for all the animals, but the scorpions were STILL FLIPPING ALIVE. if you have the guts to buy and eat a stick of scorpions (i didnt), the vendors will kill them for you first by grilling them up. bon appetit. ugh.

__stoked on china__
months ago i decided to take a trip to china during golden week this year (golden week is a magical time in japan with four holidays in nine days). as my trip to china approached, i could feel myself getting more and more excited. great walls, ancient statues, and interesting cultures awaited me in that foreign land across the sea of japan. planning was kept to a minimum; outside of flights, trains, and hostel reservations, my itinerary was completely open for random adventures to ensue. i chose to visit two very different cities - beijing and xi'an - not only to see some [in]famous landmarks, but also to experience some of the diversity china has to offer. six days to see two cities with one awesome travel buddy and zero elementary school english classes; i couldnt wait to start already.

qianmen, beijing

__arrival to beijing__
i finally arrived to beijing after six hours on a train and six more hours in various planes and airports. when we found our hostel, we were surprised to hear that they already sold our room to someone else. that was so nice of them. we walked around the area carrying our luggage (read: a small backpack) while looking for another place, but due to a three-day holiday we knew nothing about beforehand, all the other hostels and hotels were either full or crazy expensive. we ended up eating the cost and staying in a hotel room with no hot water for about $60 a night. lame.

qianmen diaje - we accidentaly started our trip on a pretty, yet touristy, street

__tiananmen square__
the next morning we woke up early and, after walking through qianmen a little bit to get adjusted to our surroundings, we decided to head to tiananmen square. during the walk and throughout the day, strong winds and continual dust storms ensured that i got plenty of dirt in my eyes, nose, and mouth. yum. when we got there we noticed that tiananmen square was already packed with people and under tight security - probably because of the holidays.

monument to the peoples heroes

communism

walking around the largest city square in the world was surreal to say the least. just 20 or so years ago, hundreds of protesters supporting democracy and economic reforms were murdered by their own government in that very square. adding to the ominousness, a gigantic portrait of mao zedong, leader of the chinese revolution, hung over the gate of heavenly peace and watched over the square at all times.

the gate of heavenly peace

__flag lowering ceremony__
much later in the day, we returned to tiananmen square to watch the lowering of the flag ceremony. we got there just in time and took our place near the front of a huge mass of people. soldiers came out through the gate of heavenly peace and started marching straight at us. when they reached the front of the crowd, they began yelling at us in chinese and pushing us backwards. they were parting the crowd to make more room for someone or something. im not ashamed to admit that i was a little scared of being yelled at in a language i dont understand right outside the location of a terrible massacre done by men *possibly* wearing the same uniform as these soldiers. needless to say, it was fun to observe for a little while, we got out of there pretty quick.

flag ceremony

about two and a half months ago, during a couple of exceptionally cold winter nights in japan, i wrote my first short story since high school. it was for "three-minute fiction," a short story contest by NPR. there were only three rules i had to follow: (1) a character must tell a joke, (2) a character must cry, and (3) it must be less than 600 words. since i didnt win the contest, ive decided to post it here for the world to read. check out the results of the contest and the more-talented writing of the winner here.

Together to the End

The world pouring through my eyes seems to slow to a crawl as my brain adjusts to the chaos happening around me. The screams of terrified passengers begin to drown my senses. My right hand instinctively shoots out to find Ashlyn's trembling hand. I grab it tightly. With the violent descent our bodies are experiencing, I barely even notice something hard digging between our locked fingers. I decide to ignore the throbbing pain for now and take stock of our situation. This plane - what once was our means to starting a new life together - is falling to the ground and taking our hopes and dreams down with it.

With wide eyes I look deep into Ashlyn's and notice that tears have already started falling down her pallid cheeks. My heart drops faster than a broken plane ever could. Through her eyes I can sense right away that she isn't entertaining any naive hopes for a fairytale ending either. We both know these will probably be the last moments we ever share together.

As I squeeze her hand tighter, my mind races to think of ways to ease her suffering. "No matter what happens," I choke through clenched teeth, "I want you to know that I will always love you." As I force my mouth into the shape of a "U", she stops crying long enough to reciprocate with an equally strained smile.

The passengers all around us become even more frantic and hysterical as the plane dives faster to the ground. In a last-ditch attempt to put a real smile on her face, I recall one of my favorite memories. "Hey Ash," I shout trying to get her full attention. "Remember the first thing I ever said to you?" She doesn't respond, so I squeeze her hand just a little harder and continue. "At Cleary's... in Boston... after making eye contact all night..." I pause to push back some of the hair covering her forehead to reveal a small scar above her eyebrow. "Remember the bandage you wore that night to cover this up? I thought I was so witty with that cheesy pick-up line..."

The plane lurches forward sending many of the people around us into the chairs in front of them. In the corner of my eye, I see an unfortunate flight attendant thrown down the aisle towards the cockpit. But during these hectic seconds of free fall, Ashlyn and I continue to hold hands and try to replay the moments we first met in our heads.

Returning to my story, I ask, "Remember how I pointed to your bandage and asked if it hurt," pausing briefly, "when you fell from heaven?" My heart melts almost instantly as I see a genuine smile appear across her face. It contagiously spreads to mine, and before I know it, I'm smiling too.

The last few moments of terror are quickly washed away by a wave of calming joy that only two people truly in love can ever experience. "How fitting," she finally responds as we both begin to smile bigger than before.

The sight of ground through the windows approaches faster now, but we continue to look into each others' eyes and relive the memories we shared together. Even when fears of the impending crash eventually take hold again, our hands remain locked tight. In my last few moments I realize something is still painfully digging in to my hand. I glance down to see what it is, and notice her new wedding ring driving into the bones of my fingers.

waking up at 5 on a dark saturday morning is usually a terrible idea. please let this be one of the few exceptions. i put on some clothes, strap on a backpack, and catch the first train out of town. koyasan (高野山), the capital of japanese buddhism, here i come!
after an hour and a half train ride i meet up with friends with a car, and we begin our epic road trip. unfortunately, as we near the top of the mountain, we suddenly find ourselves in a very dangerous situation. snow begins to line the winding road. before long, the pavement gives way to ice. when our small car begins to slide on a particularly slippery patch, we make the smart decision to immediately turn around and go back. road trip fail :(

we drive back down the mountain and head for the nearest train station. three trains, a cable car, a bus, and about four hours later, we finally arrive at the top of koyasan.
our long and dangerous journey ends as we start walking through a snowy picturesque landscape. we slowly make our way through the beautiful snow to the buddhist temple where we'll be staying for the night.
a very nice monk hands us slippers and takes us to our room. after we make ourselves some green tea to warm up and unwind, we head back downstairs for some legendary 精進料理 ("shojin ryori", buddhist cuisine). this delicious and 100% vegetarian meal might just be the best part of the whole trip. while i eat, i contemplate when i can afford to come here again because the food is just THAT good.
we all hop in the 露天風呂 ("rotenburo", outdoor public bath) to relax after dinner. sitting in a hot onsen (温泉) on a cold snowy night is one of the best feelings one can experience, period.

the next morning we wake up early again (5:30am!!) and head downstairs to observe the monks' morning rituals of chanting sutras, burning incense, bowing, and many other buddhisty things. we eat another shojin ryori for breakfast, and then leave our temple to explore the town. we spend hours walking in a gentle snow storm through okono-in (奥の院), a famous buddhist cemetery, and the garan (伽藍), a complex of pagodas, temples, and statues.
we have to leave the mountain fairly early due to the 10 hour commute some of us have to sit through before we can be back "home". personally, i cant wait until i have the time, money, and friends to do this exact trip again.

living in the "deep south" of the kii peninsula (紀伊半島) in japan has opened my mind to foreign concepts such as genuine hospitality and neighborly kindness. maybe its the japanese culture; maybe its the small town life; or maybe it means ive only lived in mean american cities. whatever the reason may be, i am thankful to experience just how nice people can be to random strangers here in the dirty south.

to the lady working at the car repair shop just outside of town:
i promise i didnt mean to get off at the wrong bus stop in the middle of nowhere. in my defense, it was my first time riding that bus and i was busy thinking about how i should introduce myself in front of an elementary school full of curious kids. i would have told you all of this if i knew any japanese or if you understood english. but despite our complete lack of communication, you somehow knew that a gaijin (外人, "foreigner") with a guitar in one hand and a bag of teaching materials in the other was hopelessly lost and desperately needed some help. thanks for taking time off of work to give me a ride to school.

to the nice japanese family who makes amazing meals for me:
when you invited me over to your house the other night for dinner, i didnt know what to expect. i was delighted to discover your hospitality knows no bounds! thanks for (possibly catching and) preparing fresh tuna sashimi (まぐろさしみ), giant shrimp tempura (天ぷらのえび), and teriyaki fish (照り焼き魚) - not to mention all the other things i dont know the names of, like that soft omelet in a cup thing and those fried vegetable cakes. i also want to thank you for the limitless amount of yebisu (ヱビス) - the only japanese beer that doesnt suck. and to top it all off, you sent me home with a warm loaf of homemade bread. you guys may be old, but youre rad as hell to me!

to the teachers who constantly bring me apples and mikans (cause thats all you think i eat):
i feel like i should remind you all sometime soon that i do in fact eat non-fruit related meals occasionally. but until then.. thanks for all the free produce.

to the nice business man in the ridiculous looking sports car:
i really did check the weather online before i left my house that morning, and it didnt say anything about rain. nevertheless, thank you for pulling over and picking up this soaked foreigner who didnt have an umbrella to protect him from the sudden torrential downpour. and thanks for going out of your way to drop me off right outside my house. i hope your overpriced sports car didnt smell like wet gaijin for too long.

to the lady who owns the liquor store:
thanks for letting me borrow your ママチャリ ("mamachari"; an old woman's bike, usually with a basket in the front) for the entire year. i can assure you its helped me maintain at least some level of sanity so far. oh and thanks for giving me a bottle of your homemade plum wine (梅酒) - it was delicious!

i am not the least bit worried about my safety here in japan. despite what the foreign media is constantly shoving in everyones faces, the tragedy HAS ALREADY HAPPENED. please note the tense of that last sentence. the earthquake already occurred. the tsunami already struck. the nuclear power plants already failed. and even if the nuclear situation deteriorated further to the absolute worst-case scenario (which seems highly unlikely), i live so far away from the plants that the meltdown would not effect my safety in the slightest.

please dont succumb to the foreign medias over-hyped exaggerated sensationalism. tragic events occurred; many innocent people lost their lives; we are all terribly saddened by what happened. but most of what the media is currently showing is over-dramatized to keep people watching and to increase ad revenue. please, for your sanity, dont buy in to it.

seriously, i appreciate the concern. its a great feeling to be reminded that there are people who care about me. with that being said, however, it pains me to know that people are needlessly worrying about me. the last thing i want to be is a burden on your conscience.

for people who like summaries (tl;dr):
the tragedies already occurred. i live far away from them. the chances of full-scale nuclear meltdowns are extremely low. but even if one were to occur, my town is far enough away to not be effected in the slightest. thus, i am not worried about my safety - and neither should you.

for people who like visuals:
this google map shows my town of kihoku (K), the center of the earthquake (E), the city of sendai which was devastated by the tsunami (S), and the town of fukushima which is where the nuclear power plants are located (F).

K = kihoku (my town), E = earthquake, S = sendai, F = fukushima

for people who like numbers:

• • distance from my town (kihoku) to the earthquake: 449.189 miles (722.9km)
• • distance from my town (kihoku) to sendai: 387.090 miles (623.0km)
• • distance from my town (kihoku) to fukushima: 346.855 miles (558.2km)

for people who like analogies:
being worried about my safety when i live almost 400 miles from where the tragedies took place, is like worrying about my vegas friends' safety if a disaster struck san fransisco.


for people who like links:

• rational information: for a healthy dose of un-exaggerated scientific explanations of what is currently going on at the fukushima power plants: MIT nuclear information hub
• monetary contribution: for people who have extra money to spare towards disaster relief (note: you can request your donations go directly to japan for the earthquake and tsunami relief efforts): american red cross
• mood lightening: for people who need a break from the sobering news reports and who enjoy pointless ridiculousness: pointless ridiculousness

first and foremost: i am currently safe and not in any immediate danger. my heart goes out to those who actually were caught up in the recent earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear reactor failures, and to those who lost friends and family to these tragic events. please, if you can, donate time or money to help the rescue operations right now.

friday afternoon, after teaching 5 classes at one of my elementary schools, i sat in the teachers office preparing next weeks lessons. while making a worksheet for my 4th graders, i started to feel dizzy like i was half drunk or something. the feeling lasted a minute or so. while some teachers didnt even notice, others were looking around with the same confused looks i had. 地震だった (earthquake)? we turned on the tv and quickly found out that there had just been a massive earthquake off the eastern coast. the news broadcast immediately started projecting the size of the inevitable tsunami that would soon follow for each coastal prefecture. when the numbers climbed to 6+ meters we began to understand the seriousness of the situation. the teachers announced to the students to go home immediately. many of them even drove the kids home themselves.

though the earthquake was too far away to shake us, we were all quite worried about the approaching tsunami. at one point they were predicting waves as high as 3 meters to hit my prefecture. and since my little seaside town sits right on the water, it was nerve-racking to say the least. as the minutes flew by, the predictions slowly shrank down to a more-reasonable 2 meters or less. but watching entire towns get swallowed up on live tv did not help calm our fears.

one of the more sobering moments was when i began seeing some of the elderly people in my town slowly start making their way to our emergency shelter.

at some point i received a text from a worried friend in america asking if i was alright. i replied that i was fine, but the phone and internet connections began to act up. over the next several hours, many of my texts failed to send, making me resend them over and over again.

a little after 5pm the major tsunami warning was lifted for my town, making it safe enough for me to finally go home. i spent all of friday night watching japanese news and the live coverage on bbc's website. important local warnings and messages were broadcast to my emergency radio almost-hourly throughout the night. at one point they started playing the tsunami sirens over the radio, which was followed by a guy yelling at me in japanese. since i couldnt understand anything more than the tsunami sirens, i jumped up, packed an emergency bag, and ran out the door all while calling friends who could translate better than i. luckily, it turned out to be a false alarm. i fell asleep wearing all my clothes, with my emergency bag as a pillow, with the tv on, and my laptop by my side.

nerves where high all weekend. tsunami warnings/advisories were in effect until sunday, major aftershocks were - and still are - expected, and the nuclear reactor problems are still ongoing. that being said, there is no need for anyone to worry about me. i am indestructible, incredibly lucky, and a good swimmer to boot. ha, but seriously i appreciate the thoughts. i am fortunate enough to live far away from where the disasters took place. my thoughts go out to those who were less fortunate.