i have a friend who is in the middle of an escalating crisis over their japanese visa and their rights as a foreign resident. their board of education has been trying their hardest to convince my friend to voluntarily give up their work visa the second they become unemployed (which is happening in 39 days) because they think its what my friend should do. but my friend thinks that they dont have to do this - and would rather not - because this person already made plans to stay in japan a little bit longer after JET. this is causing many people to get quite angry at my friend. as the days go by, more and more people are getting involved including other boards of education, other JETs, the prefectural office, and immigration. its become quite the spectacle with both sides claiming that they are right and the other is wrong. my friend has been doing some research on this convoluted issue, and id like to share their thoughts on why they think everyone else is wrong and needs to calm the fuck down.
first of all, the visa belongs to my friend. it is illegal for anyone, whether they be from the board of education or prefectural office, to try to confiscate it or force them to change it while my friend is still employed. secondly, the sponsor of their work visa, aka the town that employs them, cannot legally revoke their visa until 90 days after the termination of employment. because of this, my friend would really appreciate it if everyone could stop threatening them with deportation. thirdly, the school that my friend wants to attend for a couple of months after JET has confirmed that it is perfectly legal for them to attend school slightly-less-than full time for up to six months on a work visa. and lastly, even if my friends visa status gets revoked (which must be after 90 days), as long as they havent committed any "highly malicious" crimes while in japan, immigration will not immediately arrest, detain, or fine them. the immigration bureau of japan clearly states that the individual will be given a "departure grace period" of up to one month to get their affairs in order before they leave the country on good terms.
of course, since my friend is not a lawyer, there is a sizable chance that theyre completely wrong with their interpretation of the laws and might just get deported tomorrow. but that being said, the people at their board of education and their higher-ups who are getting increasingly angry with them are not lawyers either and might be just as wrong as well. this truly is a game of everyone thinking theyre right until proven wrong.
i cant speak for my friend, but in my personal opinion my friend is a nice, well-intentioned individual who is not deliberately trying to commit crimes and cause trouble. this person is merely trying to enjoy the multiculturalism of living abroad in an amazing country while trying to be a productive (yet temporary) member of japanese society and would rightly appreciate everyone around him to calm down about this issue.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011 |
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without a doubt, my favorite part about living in an old house in a small remote japanese town is the number of things that crawl around on my floors, walls, ceilings, and face. how could i possibly feel lonely when ive got what seems like hundreds of roommates always begging for a chance to hang out with me?
__friends with 8 legs__
first, i want to give a shout out to my old friends from last year, the gigantic huntsman spiders. i havent seen your hand-sized bodies perch on my walls all winter. and frankly, i was getting a bit worried that you may never come back to visit. sometimes i swear i can still hear the echos of your heavy footsteps - not unlike the sound of a typewriter - click-clacking on my floor as i chase you around my house with a shoe, playing a friendly game i like to call "get the fuck out of my house right now or die." fortunately, the fast-approaching summer has put my mind at ease because i get to watch all of your lovely offspring grow up right before my very eyes (dont think i didnt see them hiding in the folds of my curtains the other night, cause i totally did).
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| just hanging out in my tatami room |
__friends with no legs__
to some of my newer guests: i appreciate the company, but can you please try to pick up after yourselves more often? though i thoroughly enjoy the fact that you invite all of your lovely slug friends to party in my house on a nightly basis, seeing your trails of slime across my floors every morning kind of bums me out. no one likes messy roommates. i hope theres no hard feelings from all the salt i sprinkle around the cracks in my walls, around my doors and windows, and sometimes on your gooey bodies. its not that i enjoy watching the salt shrivel you up like a testicle in a cold breeze, its just that i really despise having to wash my floors every fucking morning because of your mess.
__friends with 100 legs__
and lastly, i want to thank all of the ムカデ ("mukade"; poisonous centipedes) for all the attention youve been giving me lately. i can tell that you are quite infatuated with me because of all the times you try to snuggle with me at night. to be honest, im quite flattered. remember the time i was about to fall asleep but suddenly noticed you were crawling around inside my pillowcase exactly where my head was supposed to go? that was cute. so cute, in fact, that i had trouble falling asleep the rest of the night because i couldnt stop thinking about it.
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| this is what my friend looked like dead |
i think i should draw the line after last night though. to be clear, im not looking for a relationship right now and id rather us just be friends. i dont know why you thought itd be ok, but crawling into my futon while i was sleeping and gently yet poisonously nibbling on my fingers was not cool. i like you and all, but i did not appreciate waking up to you trying to climb onto my face. because i fell asleep alone that night, i was so startled to wake up with you in my futon that i may have accidentally sprayed too much bug spray on you while you tried to run away from me. maybe now youll get the hint that im just not that into you.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011 |
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look, i hate kids just as much as the next guy. but since i started teaching english to little japanese children, ive actually had a slight change of heart. and though it pains me to admit it, ill man up and say it here: sometimes kids can be cute.
every week, when i show up to one of my elementary schools, a bunch of tiny kids who arent yet to-cool-for-school stop what theyre doing and run right up to me. "ku-ji-ra sen-sei!" theyll yell through gigantic smiles as they try to give me huge hugs and hold my hands. as we all keep walking closer to the entrance, some of them break away to show off how good they are at unicycling, jumping rope, or hula hooping. their faces light up when i say "上手ね" ("jouzu ne"; youre skillful) or "すごい" ("sugoi"; thats great). its pretty awesome to see kids get so happy to see me. heck, ive been in relationships before where the girls werent even half as excited to see me as some of these kids are every single day.
there have been several times now where ill be sitting in the teachers office planning future lessons when ill hear a couple of small voices call my name. first theyll say the required "しつれいします" ("shitsureishimasu"; im being rude. all students must say this before they enter the teachers office. upon leaving, they say "shitsureishimashita"; i was rude), come over to my desk, and shyly hand me something. ive received some beautiful cards and letters - usually written in japanese or the occasionally admirable but terrible attempt at english - thanking me for teaching them english, asking me to teach them more, or telling me how fun my classes are. now dont get me wrong - i, like you, think children are terrible creatures from the depths of hades - but innocent thoughtful gestures like this prove that some kids can actually be pretty freaking rad.
i like to jog around my neighborhood (read: around most of the town) a lot. more than just fun exercise, its also been a great way to interact with some of my kids outside of school. some of my younger students get so excited to see me jogging down their street that theyll stop playing catch or whatever they were doing and chase after me. "鯨先生、待っていい！" ("kujira sensei, matte ii!"; wait up, whale teacher!). some kids even jog along side me for a block or two after i ask them if theyd like to join me. my favorite time though, was when these two cute 3rd grade girls followed me on their bikes for over 3 miles, laughing and smiling the whole way. they tried talking to me while we jogged and biked, saying things like "speed up" when we were going downhill (cause bikes can coast faster than legs can jog) and "speed down" when going uphill (cause little girls are apparently wimps at biking up hills). to me, language practice, exercising, and having fun with kids that dont suck, made the time fly by so quick i barely even noticed how tired i was after the 5th mile.
ah, good times.
Wednesday, June 08, 2011 |
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this is one of many posts about my awesome trip to china. while earlier posts are about sights like
tiananmen square, the
forbidden city, and
the great wall, this one is about the actual cities themselves.
i only visited two cities during my trip to china: beijing and xi'an. the two couldnt be more different from each other if they tried. one was quite terrible while the other was incredibly awesome. in this post i hope to explain why ill never return to beijing but why i cant wait to go back to xi'an again.
__the difference in attitude__
lets start with the people. beijing people suck. now, to be clear, im not saying that all the people in beijing suck - im just stating that all the people I MET in beijing suck (for all i know, the other 19.5 million might be the raddest people in the world). many beijingers chased after me annoyingly trying to sell me something i didnt want. and when i did actually want to buy something, like at a ticket counter or restaurant, they were loud and rude. people treated me like i was nothing but a dumb american tourist with too much money to spend. and maybe i was. but in sharp contrast, the people in xi'an seemed to treat me and each other with respect. they wore more smiles, were less pushy, and were almost always helpful and patient with me. everyone in xi'an seemed generally less shady and more eager to treat me like a human being rather than an object like in beijing.
__the difference in appearance__
aside from the peoples attitudes, the feel of the cities was also very different. beijing was dirty. i watched countless beijingers - both young and old - throw their trash to the ground without a care in the world. and boy, the city sure smelled like it too. xi'an had its share of awful smells too, but at least it was a lot easier on the eyes. in contrast to beijings dull, dirty, and drab style, xi'an was a beautiful city with bright colors and pleasant architecture.
__third world capitals suck__
after traveling to india and absolutely hating delhi (while loving the other cities), i had mistakenly thought that visiting
big cities in third world-ish countries was a bad idea. but china changed my mind. its not
big cities that suck - its
capitals. xi'an is a big city with more than 8 million people, but it was absolutely awesome. now ive learned my lesson. even with having only two samples, and even though ill probably eat my own narrow-minded words later on, ill conclude right now that capitals of third world-ish countries are terrible, terrible places that should be avoided at all costs.
Saturday, June 04, 2011 |
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